O Captain, My Captain

“O Captain, My Captain”


“O Captain, my Captain. Who knows where that comes from? Anybody? Not a clue? It’s from a poem by Walt Whitman about Mr. Abraham Lincoln. Now in this class you can either call me Mr. Keating, or if you’re slightly more daring, O Captain my Captain.”


Robin Williams

I am heartbroken over the loss of Robin Williams, whose life has given so much joy and laughter to others. How could someone so revered, feel so lost? General consensus would make one believe that anyone with a gift to provide so much happiness, must relatively, be a happy person themselves.

However, the answer to this question is quite easy for me to understand, simply because I’ve been there. I know all too well that feeling of hopelessness, helplessness, and defeat. I was only 14 years old, when I decided to give up on life. I took a handful of pills and waited for peace to envelop me. Little did I know, that I would end up in the hospital with my stomach being pumped. It’s been thirty-five years since that episode and I still can remember the feeling of those tubes being shoved down my nose to pump my stomach. I can also remember the chalky taste of the charcoal they used to neutralize the effects of the pills, and the disappointed and saddened faces of the medical professionals who were feverishly working on me. 

I felt lost for a very long time and chose to end my suffering at that point.  Not understanding that it was only a point of time; a temporary period in my life, and that life had so much more to offer.

Looking back now, I am thankful to GOD that I was unsuccessful in my attempt, because the day after my first child was born, I realized how happy I was to be alive. I had this beautiful little one who loved me just because….with no conditions….with no strings attached. He needed me and loved me, as I loved him. 

For so long, Robin Williams was able to overcome the demons of drug abuse, only to succumb to the darkness of depression. 

Those individuals who consider suicide, have reached an extreme level of desperation and believe they are left with no viable options at that point. They can see no other way out. No one knows their loneliness. No one can imagine their despair or the feeling that there is no hope left for them.

But, I’m here to tell you that this couldn’t be further from the truth. At one point or another, we have all experienced these feelings, but it takes a strong will to reach out for help.  Here is the good news…


Help may be in the form of a stranger, a doctor, a friend, the clergy, but it’s out there. 

People who commit suicide take the easy road out for themselves, but they have no idea of the pain and guilt that forever lives in the hearts of those they leave behind.

The only thing I keep coming back to with Robin Williams is that possibly the idea of having to take medication for the depression and anxiety may have stiffled his natural affinity to make us laugh. Truth be told, “O Captain, My Captain,” I believe your family would rather have had a lifetime of being with you, then to lose you so tragically. 

Mr. Williams, you were so much more than a comedic genius. Every performance, whether comedic or dramatic, touched the lives of others and we loved you for it. You will forever be missed, “O Captain, My Captain.”

Please, if you or anyone you know is suffering from depression, which you are not being treated for, there is help out there for you.

STATISTICS2011 U.S. Suicide Deaths CDC & Prevention

White males – 28,103
White females – 7,672
Black males – 1,828
Black females – 413
Asian/Pacific Islander males – 720
Asian/Pacifi Islander females – 323
American Indian/Alaska Native males – 352
American Indian/Alaska Native females – 107

Suicide Prevention


National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is available for free 24/7 and is completely confidential.

Text “CTL” to 741741  Crisistext/me.org/textline

TTY: 800-799-4TTY (4889

Spanish: 888-628-9454

Veteran’s Crisis line: 800-273-8255 #1 or send via text message to 838255 for confidential support 24/7/365


As my heart sobs, I plead in prayer for any chance of redemption for Robin Williams in Heaven. I also pray for those at risk, in hopes that they will find their Pathway to Spiritual Rebirth, in whatever form that looks like for them, as long as they always choose life in the end.

James 4:8 says, “Draw near to GOD and He will draw near to you.



About Candace Frazer

Candace Frazer is a Certified Personal Life Coach and a Motivational Speaker. She is presently attending the Ohio Christian University, pursuing a second Master's degree in Ministry with a concentration in Pastoral Care and Counselling. She graduated from the College of New Rochelle, New Rochelle, NY, with a Dual Master's Degree in Special/General Education, and a Minor in Gifted Education. She taught Adult Education at Hostos Community College, Bronx, NY. Presently, she is an Associate Minister at Pleasant Hill Church in Roswell, GA, flourishing in the Word of GOD and Surrendering to His will for her life.

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